Social Networking Tip: If you’re going to write me, write to me

By John Aberle | Business Lifestyle

Jun 24

Social networking - people graphics surrounding globe

To connect using social networking, make it personal

Social networking can be a blessing or just another annoyance. Used properly, it’s a wonderful tool for heart-centered, soft sell salespeople and marketers because it shows you as a person. Prospects and customers want to come to know, like and trust you. When they discover you’re a person too, it can help you to connect with them. Done wrong it merely shows you lack good sense and manners so it will hurt your ability to connect in a positive way. Remember, social networking is about being social and interacting with people. Which brings us to today’s social networking tip: If you’re writing “me” (anyone you want to join your network) to become my friend or make a connection, then write to “me.”

LinkedIn and Facebook as well as most other social networking sites have marvelous tools for inviting everyone in your different mailing lists to join you on their sites. If I know you personally, especially in the non-virtual or physical world of daily living, then you can get away with an impersonal automated request – and I will probably join you because you are my friend out here.

Even then, however, taking a moment to write a little bit extra about why you want me, or everyone else in your database, to join you on this latest social networking site would be nice. For example, “I find that LinkedIn is really popular with business people and has lots of useful forum or groups that I think you might find as useful as I do” would help me to understand it’s value to me.

To connect, make it personal

If, on the other hand, we’ve never met, then I would appreciate knowing why you want to be friends. What do we have in common? Are you a writer too, an Internet marketer, in sales and marketing, in my religion, appreciate SciFi/Fantasy or just reading, love to travel, enjoy photography, are a graduate of a school I attended, met at a seminar, or you like my restaurant reviews as the Anaheim Restaurant Examiner? The choices are numerous.

In my daily life, I’m not friends with everyone I meet. I’m friendly, yes. But I rarely take the time to develop close relationships. Social networking gives me the opportunity to actually get to know more people in bits and pieces. But if creating a new friendship isn’t important enough to jot a very short note as to why you would like to be friends on Facebook or connect on LinkedIn or any of the other social networking sites, then you don’t really want my friendship. You are just trying to attract numbers. That’s all right. It’s just not what I want in a friend or a connection.

Social networking done with integrity and authenticity is a powerful tool for heart-centered, soft sell salespeople and marketers because it enables you to reveal a human side to your personality. My heart-centered social networking tip is this: if you want to write to invite me or anyone else to be part of your community, make it personal. Jot a note. Write to me, or anyone else, like you really wanted to connect with me and not just make another notch on your gun belt or tick mark on your score card.

I would love to hear your comments on this. Please post a comment specific to this article so I know it’s not spam – or on Facebook, you can flag it thumbs up or thumbs down or mark it however your favorite bookmarking site allows. And if you want to connect, here are three of my links:

  • – you don’t have to request to be a friend or for a connection on Twitter. Just follow.

About the Author

My first Kindle eBook, How Relationship Selling Rewards Small Businesses, went live on April 24, 2012. I've lived a lifetime of service and spiritual search so it's natural for me to incorporate these attitudes into my work. I believe that selling and marketing are spiritual service when done with a heart-centered, relationship selling approach. All of business success comes down to building strong relationships.